An Uneventful Post.

30w 4d

This weekend was very nice and somewhat relaxing. It was the last weekend for a while that we didn't have something going on, with my showers coming up for the next two weekends and new babies to play with soon. Plus, it is getting more and more challenging to actually DO things. Getting out of the car is fun and bending over is like Christmas morning. *note the sarcasm here*
Friday night we celebrated Paul's birthday with family at our favorite local pizza spot and had some fun:

My mom also busted out a bag, a very large bag, of baby clothes that she had picked up. I must say, BL will never go naked (unless he wants to). I am seriously contemplating making a note on my registry to only buy 6-12 month clothes if one wishes to do so. Paul and I are always talking about how lucky we are to have such a wonderful group of friends and family. BL is so fortunate.

Saturday was a big day for me. I got a pedicure. Yep, that's it. The scene looked much like the second picture above and I proceeded to scare the poor lady giving Denise a pedicure since I mentioned her perhaps pushing on some pressure points since she is 9 months pregnant. The rest of the evening, Paul and I went to dinner and rented a movie. (Untraceable for those interested. I would highly recommend it.) In more exciting news, I got word that a friend was on her way to the hospital to have her baby (the first in the long line of summer 2008 children). I have not heard anything since then, which leads me to assume that she indeed has an outside baby now and is quite busy. When I do hear, I will fill the Internet in!

Sunday was quite uneventful. We went to a friend's daughter's birthday party and tried to hang some stuff in the nursery, only to find that Ikea does not provide the necessary hardware with their products, so that project will have to wait. Hours of Dirty Jobs and naps followed.

So there you go. It's Monday and I have nothing exciting to report, which after the last 2 weeks is quite welcomed in my little world.

Dear Baby - 30 Weeks

30w

Dear Baby,

So? Am I pregnant enough yet? Do I finally qualify as being a full-blown pregnant person? One of my favorite things that people have been saying to me at different points in my pregnancy is, "Oh you're barely pregnant!" or "You have a long way to go!". Really? Barely pregnant? Can someone explain this to me? 5 weeks pregnant or 35 weeks pregnant, I have news for you: You're pregnant. There is a tiny, or not-so-tiny person growing inside of you. And the "long way to go" comment? Another favorite. I am sure fellow pregnant women would agree yes, please tell me again, how long to I have to go? Because I don't know a single pregnant woman that has no clue how far along she is at any given second during the day. I have approximately 69 days, 16 hours, 47 minutes and 17 seconds until BL is officially due, by-the-way.

Now that we have cleared that up, HI BABY LUC! How are you today? Sleepy I presume since you have been pretty quiet this morning. I have only gotten a couple "Hey there mom, what's this big cushy thing right here, let me poke it so you know what I am talking about" kicks since I woke up. What's really funny is that I have realized that I wake you up in the middle of the night by walking to the bathroom to pee. Even before I hit the bed again, you are all, "Yessss disco time!" and continue to bounce around for the next 15-20 minutes. So imagine me, 30 weeks pregnant and nearing a full waddle, tip-toeing to the bathroom in complete darkness, bouncing off walls, dressers and the bed in a half sleep trying not to disturb you. I knew you would get a kick out of that. No pun intended.

The website entries that I read are getting consistently shorter now, I guess you are not doing anything that interesting compared to when you were 12 weeks old and simultaneously growing arms, legs, kidneys and coming up with a way to lower gas prices at the same time. Alas, I think you are still doing cool stuff. For instance you are still growing. Crazy, right?! You are about 16-17 inches long and weigh somewhere around 3-3.2 pounds (like a head of cabbage supposedly). Your lanugo (the hair that covers your body and keeps you warm) is falling off this week since you are getting fat enough to regulate your own temperature. This makes mommy sad, since we no longer have hairy bodies in common. Your eyesight is about 20/400, which is HORRIBLE for those playing at home. This is why you can only see objects a couple inches in front of you.

I have another doctor appointment tomorrow, but I am going to venture to guess what position you are in now. I think it looks a little something like this:

I say this only because I am getting the same kick on both sides of my stomach, which means that they are originating from legs or arms. I'm thinking legs since they hurt so much. Or you could still be sideways and just incredibly talented and timing your punches and kicks at the same exact time and with the same exact force. If this is the case, I am going out to buy your newborn karate garb this afternoon. I think we have the next Jackie Chan on our hands.

Hey, come on out in 7-10 weeks would ya?

"Nobody makes me bleed my own blood."

29w 6d

Dodgeball fans? Anyone? Anyone? Alright then. I met with my registered dietitian (RD for the cool kids) today. I am officially on my second full day of testing my blood, which she wanted me to do, and when I proudly showed her my results (all perfect) and food diary over the last 2 days, she was all "HUH?! Is this how you normally eat?" and I was all, "Pretty much". She laughed, I did too (nervously) and then she pretty much flew through my "meal plan" that she set up on the spot and proceeded to tell me, "Follow this, BUT if you numbers start getting wacky, or low, just go back to what you were doing".

So it was pretty much a joke. Not that the lady wasn't nice (she was very nice) and I am not going to take this seriously (I totally am), I mean it was a joke in the sense that the hobbit that the doctor's office keep in the file room MUST have switched my results with someone else's. Alas, I am STILL a gestational diabetic, I STILL have to test my blood 4 times a day until further notice and I STILL have to be very careful in my food choices, even though I already am. The good news is that I now have a better understanding of when and how much of certain foods that I can eat - including ice cream if I so please. BUT I have to watch the portion and of course count that as my 1 carb and 1 fat for that time of day and the serving is only 1/2 cup and I should aim for low fat, sugar or fat free. Did I just lose you? Don't worry. I am not going to get into the diabetic exchanges - that would be soooo boring.

All in all, it was a good meeting. I really like my RD, she still thought I was funny, and I learned a good bit. The nerd in me can't wait to tear into my new book Choose Your Foods: Exchange Lists for Diabetes and read all about proper portion sizes for foods. I wish it came in a pocket version.

The testing has gone well so far, except that I have to prick myself pretty deep to get a good enough blood sample, it's tons of fun. It's almost like a challenge to me though - I can't wait to see my test result pop up and tell me that I was a good girl at my last meal. He's my new buddy (the test meter), I talk to him and tell him how cute he is. He rewards me with perfect glucose levels, I kiss him goodnight and put him back in his case for a nap. The other guy in the case, Mr. Finger Pricker and his friends the lancets, I don't like them as much so I tend to ignore them and try not to piss them off.

A welcomed change of pace.

29w 5d

Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a "cutesy" baby person. There are very few "baby-looking items" that I would make my child wear/sleep with/be surrounded with. I am just not into Pooh or Mickey the way others are. I could never live with myself if I forced my child to sleep in a room covered in Pooh bears, it's just not me. I try my hardest to spread the love for more modern items to others as well. You won't see me giving character onesies or ruffled underwear at baby showers. Not this girl.

Here are some recent and one not-so-recent finds of mine that I am completely in love with:

Baby socks from Trumpette:
Seriously, how cute are these? And perfect for newborns. I have read that they run small though, so the 0-12 month fitting size may turn into 0-5 months for your chunky monkey. But that's still a good 5 months of wearing time!
Johnny's $24.50 (includes 6 pair, various colors)

6 Socks That Rock $24.50

Next up is the DwellStudio Alphabet Baby Hooded Towel ($26 on sale at Design Public). Also, there is a matching 3 Piece Bib and Burp Set on sale for $19 at the same site. Adorable and educational, I say!

Last but certainly not least is the Ugly Doll. Please tell me you have seen these guys. I had my first Ugly Doll encounter at a local smoothie shop and I think these guys are awesome. Why buy those perfect bitches Barbie and Bratz, or GI Joe? Face it, your husband will never look like Joe, and your chick will never have the perfect physique of Barbie. Let's teach our kids that people, animals, and things are not perfect. Sometimes, they are so ugly they are cute! Just like Babo's Bird here ($20 through Ugly Doll):

And you know your child will cling to this sucker like cheap TP on your ass. Imagine the looks of horror you will get from those crazy old bittys at the grocery store! Worth every penny.

Happy shopping!!

Keep it comin'!

29w 4d STILL.

I swear. I always say that bad things happen in 3's. AND THEY ALWAYS DO.
1. I am diagnosed with gestational diabetes.
2. My health insurance denies the claim for the nice nurse to come to my house and teach me how to make myself bleed 4 times daily. I now have to go to the hospital and meet with a nurse that hacked up a lung while I was on the phone with her. She thinks I am funny though, I am sure we'll get along fine.
3. Are you ready for this? I don't think you are. You might want to get that popcorn out again...my pharmacy just called to tell me that when they ran my insurance info, it came up as "policy terminated".

Carry on.

Turn, turn we almost become dizzy.

29w 4d

It's amazing where support will come from. Some people you never imagine will support you, do. Some people you would think would be considerate and supportive, aren't. Then there are always the people you KNOW will offer support and always come through for you. The reliable ones. Thank you. This weekend was difficult for me to say the least. The tiniest things were setting my frustration off. I blamed myself a lot, even though I know this isn't my fault. I wanted to scream at people, but I refrained. I cried, of course. Last night I woke up thinking about an Oreo Blizzard from DQ. Of course the cravings come now. When I can't have them. Do you know how many Oreo Blizzards I have had since I have been pregnant? ONE. Oh the irony.

"Would you like dessert tonight? Strawberry cheesecake? Double fudge volcano explosion?"
Me: "No."
What I really wanted to say: "NO. Normally I don't get dessert. Only on rare occasions. But since you asked, NO. I can't have those. Even if I wanted to. My body hates me right now. Do you have any celery I could nibble on?!"

"Oh this cake is soooo good..."
Me: "Is it?"
What I really wanted to say: "F you. How dare you throw that in my face. I can't have cake. I hope you choke on it. I don't even like cake anyways. But you know what? You always want what you can't have, right?"

Angry? A little. Frustrated? Completely. Rational? Probably not, as exhibited above. I know these people mean no harm. I know the waitress was only doing her job. I know the cake person was only making small talk. I know I am not being fair, but you know what? I can't help it. I know there are people out there who deal with this their entire life. I have 10 weeks. Maybe I am just being a baby. This would not surprise me since there is one in my abdomen.

In other news, HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAUL!! We love you! Plus, did anyone notice that we are under 75 days now? Also, this blog has reached over 10,000 hits! Thank you all for reading! Now start doing a better job of commenting! Email me if you need help figuring out how. Have a wonderful Monday!

"Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes but I work it out Then I, Look up at the sky My mouth is open wide, lick and taste What's the use in worrying, what's the use in hurrying Turn, turn we almost become dizzy" -DMB

Rehab for defective bodies.

29w 1d

So I guess people like to move fast with this GD (gestational diabetes) shit! I have already spoke with the nurse at the specialist's office and as long as the insurance goes through I should receive my testing kit pretty fast, then a nurse will come to my house and I will have a 2 hour lesson on how to check my blood sugar, what to eat, etc. I will then have to call in my daily results, sounds like a blast right? The program lasts 21 days (just like rehab! I feel like such a celeb) and if I have everything under control at the end of the 21 days, I am discharged from the program. I wonder if they will sing to me when I am done like in the movie? Maybe they will ask me to be in the next diabetes commercial with BB King. See? I am trying to be funny. Trying to cheer myself up.

The nurse on the phone made me feel so good. After she asked me all the "Do you have high blood pressure? Heart issues? Placenta problems? Obesity? etc etc..." she said, "This really came out of left field for you, huh? You are the right weight, super healthy, no issues."
Can I carry her in my pocket from now on? For all the times I am sure people will think that I made this happen, that I did something wrong, that I must be overweight?

I also went home for lunch and cried in Paul's arms for a while. I do have the best husband ever. When I shared my frustration that this is not fair, I eat healthy, I take good care of myself, I know plenty of pregnant women who take horrible care of themselves and never get GD, people are going to think I am a horrible person...do you know what he said? "Who gives a shit what other people think?" And he's right. This is not my fault. This is not my fault.

Failure Part II

29w 1d

So I guess I spoke too soon. I was told I would have the 3 hour results by Wednesday, so when I didn't hear anything all day Wednesday OR Thursday, I thought I was good. Evidently not. I was totally caught off guard this morning when the phone rang. I failed 2 of the 4 tests, thus making me diabetic.

What this means to me: I am a failure. I feel like I have failed myself, but most importantly, this baby. I am really, really embarrassed. Completely lost. They told me I barely failed the first test, how can I fail the second test as well?

What is REALLY (medically) means: According to the Diabetes Association of America, "The placenta supports the baby as it grows. Hormones from the placenta help the baby develop. But these hormones also block the action of the mother's insulin in her body. This problem is called insulin resistance. Insulin resistance makes it hard for the mother's body to use insulin. She may need up to three times as much insulin.

Gestational diabetes starts when your body is not able to make and use all the insulin it needs for pregnancy. Without enough insulin, glucose cannot leave the blood and be changed to energy. Glucose builds up in the blood to high levels. This is called hyperglycemia."

This means that I have to start checking my blood sugar 4 times a day and visiting a nutritionist. I really really have to watch the amount of sugar I take in and "can't have those cookies or candies anymore!" according to the nurse. Funny thing is, I don't really have large doses of cookies and candy anyways.

I have to keep reminding myself that I did not do anything wrong. This is my body. My body just simply does not like being pregnant and cannot keep up it's normal duties and grow a baby. Once I have BL, my body should go back to normal. This doesn't even mean that I will have gestational diabetes in future pregnancies.

What this means for BL: Again, according to the ADA, "When you have gestational diabetes, your pancreas works overtime to produce insulin, but the insulin does not lower your blood glucose levels. Although insulin does not cross the placenta, glucose and other nutrients do. So extra blood glucose goes through the placenta, giving the baby high blood glucose levels. This causes the baby's pancreas to make extra insulin to get rid of the blood glucose. Since the baby is getting more energy than it needs to grow and develop, the extra energy is stored as fat."

If untreated, the baby could get way too big, which would ultimately lead to a c-section (something I DO NOT want) since he would be big and risk shoulder injury during vaginal birth. He would also possibly need to come early to risk him getting too large. Untreated gestational diabetes can also effect babies' breathing at birth since they would have low blood glucose levels.

I need to stop Googling. I WILL get this under control. I have less than 11 weeks to go and what that means to me is that I have less than 11 weeks to make sure that BL comes into this world as healthy as possible. I can't wait to start hearing all of the dumb ass comments people make to me now.

Dear Baby - 29 Weeks

29 Weeks

Dear Baby,

Ouch. For real. What are you doing in there? You better come out with an in-womb-homemade dagger set, or some serious nun chucks because I don't think it's possible for a 2.6 pound, 16 inch little boy to cause that much discomfort and movement. Wow. Your dad and I (and some others) are convinced that you are perhaps super intelligent, growing at Jack-like rates or are incredibly bored and just haven't quite figured how to get out yet. (Please don't do this. You need to cook longer) I'm serious BL, people can see you move from the outside from across a room. You're such a little show-off!

This past week was a challenge for us, as we were used for a human pin cushion since Friday and you went on two separate sugar-induced highs from the lovely glucose drink. Good news though - I passed the 3-hour glucose test and all is fine and dandy in the world of sugar consumption and gestational diabetes. I have also began my twice-monthly appointments, and you know what that means - we are almost there. I will go at 30, 32, 34 and 36 weeks THEN I will start once-a-week appointments until you decide to come out and play. Time is flying by and with showers starting soon, and the impending births of all of your little friends, I know you will be here in no time. We cannot wait to meet you and see what all the in-womb fuss was about.

You are demanding more calcium from me, which explains my constant milk/cheese/yogurt cravings, so that your bones can continue to get stronger (you know, because the hard elbows and knees protruding from my stomach weren't enough). Your brain is also growing larger, so that means that your head is too. Perfect.

Your dad and I were having fun looking at the progression of my belly shots last night and I was making fun of myself for thinking I was SO HUGE at 12 weeks. Pfft. I was SKINNY. I have gotten bigger from last week and I know it will continue to happen as you grow. I am sure I will look back at this week's picture towards the end and laugh that I had no clue just how huge I was capable of getting. But the good news is that there are no noticeable stretch marks yet (that I can see) and that I am still wearing my wedding rings. I also have been noticing that infamous dark line making it's presence known under my belly button.

Only 11 more weeks until we can begin teaching you how to clean up cat puke at 6am.

Baby Booms and Constellations

28w 6d

Yesterday went well. The phlebotomist was able to get the first three blood draws out of my non-battered arm on the first try, then on the very last draw my vein blew so she had to go to the bruised side. She got it the first try though. She told me I would probably have a matching bruise on my right arm because the vein gave out but so far so good. Now I just have a constellation-looking pattern of needle pricks. I didn't feel queasy after drinking the orange goodness on an empty stomach, but I was soooo sleepy the entire 3.5 hours I was there. I was that creepy girl in the waiting room doing all the things I hate. I asked people coming out of the ultrasound room with yards of pictures and huge smile on their faces, "What are you having?!"
I also sat there and read my breastfeeding book with a giant picture of a woman breastfeeding her child on the cover, trying to see who squirmed when they looked at it. I had a good time. I should know by today if I am good to go or not.

Moving on, have I ever mentioned the baby boom on here? Can't remember. Well, I know a lot of people having babies. I belong to a super secret society called a message board and there are currently 7 of us that are pregnant (one JUST gave birth on Sunday to a girl). I also have a pregnant sister-in-law, and 3 friends that are expecting. So far the grand total for still-inside baby's genders is 4 girls, 6 boys and one to be determined. Penises are taking over! I wanted to take a quick minute and say CONGRATS to Mrs. Markley, an avid blog reader and grade-A comment-leaver. She is also a great friend and will make a wonderful mommy. She is the newest to join the club and finally told pretty much the world recently, which gives me the right to broadcast it on here. She is due for an outside baby around Feb. 8, 2009.

So in case you didn't get the memo, don't drink the water. Or drink it. Your choice.

Failure.

28w 4d

As I wrote last week, I had my glucose test on Friday. They told me no news was good news, so when my phone rang this afternoon with a familiar number, I was instantly disappointed. I failed, "not by much" so they told me. I decided to get the 3 hour test over with and take it tomorrow morning. The nurse wasn't very pleasant on the phone, pretty much talking to me like I was a horrible person and/or child. Yes, I get it, no eating after 8pm. I am not some ogre-like character burning through boxes of Little Debbi's all night.

So here I am, fasting until 8:15am tomorrow at which time I will show up at the doctor AGAIN and have my blood drawn AGAIN, drink the glucose drink AGAIN, then proceed to have my blood drawn every hour for the next 3 hours. Good thing I have some reading material. I think what I am most upset about are my horrible veins that refuse to show themselves when the time is right. This usually involves a lot of digging with needles for long periods of time, resulting in something that looks like this:

Basically what I am trying to tell you is that there won't be an early post tomorrow. Think of me, sitting in the lab, getting poked every hour while you are enjoying your needle free day. *tear.

The Two Smartest Men I Know.

28w 4d

So I bet you think I forgot about Father's Day, huh? Actually I didn't and I meant to write yesterday, but the day was so busy I pretty much collapsed by the time we got home last night. On with the tributes!

First up, my dad.

I would like to think that I have one of the best dad's on earth. Actually, I know I do. It's so hard to even begin to write about my dad so that readers that do not know him well will understand the kind of person he is. My dad is the Jack of all Trades, or the Jerry of all Trades if you want to get technical. He is one of the smartest men I know, whether he believes it or not. I am proud to say that I inherited his common sense, technical, and artistic abilities. The man can literally build you a new car, draw you a new car, then teach you how to negotiate properly to make sure you do not pay too much for a car.

His smile lights up rooms, and his personality sets them on fire. He can walk into a new place, (let's use the Happiest Place on Earth, Walt Disney World, as an example) not knowing a single soul, and walk away with complete strangers clamouring to have dinner with him and his family because they are now best friends. He makes friends everywhere he goes!

My dad has taught me so many things in life that I carry with me every day - and always will. I love him so much and admire him in so many ways. I already know he will be a wonderful grandfather to BL, because if he applies HALF of the love he did towards me, it will be more than enough. I love you dad!

Next up is the newest daddy to the bunch, my wonderful hubabubs, Paul:

I have to tell a story about Paul and an encounter that he recently had with his son. On Saturday night, we were relaxing on the couch, watching some TV and like I always do, I let Paul know that my stomach was moving like crazy. BL has been so active lately I am convinced now more than ever that he is trying to escape via belly button. Paul came over to where I was laying, put his face close to my stomach and started talking to BL. He also wanted front row seats to watch the movement. Well Paul said something funny, which made me laugh, causing my entire stomach to bounce up and down. But Paul didn't know it was me that was making it do that. The look on his face was priceless! He actually was so startled that he had to run for the bathroom for fear of wetting himself! BL is strong, but not THAT strong!

That is an example of one of the many encounters that Paul has had with BL so far, but not my favorite. Watching Paul during ultrasounds is the best thing EVER. I am so lucky to be married to a man that cares so deeply about this baby. It is so evident that he already loves him so much. I never had any doubts though, since I know what kind of a man he is towards others. Paul is the other smartest man I know. I have learned so much from him in the short time that I have known him. I hope that I have taught him as well and I cannot wait to take this journey of parenthood with him. I cannot think of a better man to be the father of my children. I wish I had half the compassion and love that Paul exhibits every day of his life.

Paul, I appreciate everything you are doing, and have done to make my life and BL's life as wonderful as possible. Thank you for being such a wonderful and supportive husband - I can't wait to see what you do with fatherhood! Happy 1st Father's Day! I love you!

Let's chat.

28w 1d

I had a doctor's appointment this morning. I also had to do my glucose test today, which involved chugging a bottle of orange yumminess at 7 this morning and then getting my blood drawn at the doctor's office to see if I am at risk for gestational diabetes. Of course my veins were stupid today. Of course they had to dig around in my arm to catch one. Of course my arm now feels like it will fall off by lunchtime. Other than that, it was a fun appointment!

I normally don't ask about how much weight I have gained because I figure that if I am doing something wrong, they will tell me. I do always peek at the scale as the nurse weighs me. She always tries to be so sneaky about it, but I see the number! Today I did ask where I started and through some awesome math, I figured that I have gained about 19 pounds. That is right on track, if you want to know. The American Pregnancy Association recommends that women who are a normal weight (based on your BMI) gain 25-37 pounds during pregnancy. Overweight women gain less, underweight gain more. I was at a normal BMI index at the beginning of my pregnancy. Also very interesting is how much the baby factory weighs by the end of the pregnancy:

• 7 1/2 pounds is about how much the baby will weigh by the end of pregnancy.
• 1 1/2 pounds is how much the placenta weighs.
• 4 pounds is attributed to increased fluid volume.
• 2 pounds is the weight of the uterus.
• 2 pounds is the weight of breast tissue.
• 4 pounds is because of increased blood volume.
• 7 pounds is attributed to maternal stores of fat, protein and other nutrients.
• 2 pounds for the amniotic fluid.
• Total: 30 pounds

Of course if you are someone whose name starts with a "C" and ends with a "olleen", you would tack on another pound plus some change for the baby's weight as your estimate. Which brings me to my next thought - Notice the new little ad on the sidebar? Click on it and join in the fun! Make your guesses now for Baby Luc and I promise the winner will get some sort of fabulous prize that I have not thought of yet. Be nice with the baby's weight and length, I am hoping some good vibes will be sent to BL and he stays a 'manageable' size.

Dear Baby - 28 Weeks

28w

Dear Baby,

Moo. That's right, moo. Evidently you are producing androgen and estrogen now that will stimulate my breast milk to come in. I haven't sprung a leak yet, but I suspect it will happen at a very inopportune time - like while I am out to eat, with a client, or when I finally get to meet Barack Obama. So this whole edema thing, it keeps happening every other week. So strange. From what I can tell, it has NOTHING to do with the weather but more to do with your position. So do me a favor little one, move your ass off of whatever you are sitting on and let some fluid and blood flow in and out of my legs. Was that a no that I just heard? Okay then, I will have the masseuse help me out in that department tonight. Yes, internets, I am bragging. But this will surely make you feel sorry for me:

If the hugeness of the State Puff feet don't make you sad, the state of my toenails and leftover burnt skin surely will.

Besides playing with my organs and causing me to swell all of the time, you now enjoy running your elbows up and down my insides. You only do this when I go to bed and I lay on my left side. I must say, it the weirdest feeling EVER. Are you doing baby yoga in there? I suspect that you are. That or you are practicing your form for free-throws and using my ribs as a target. I know I sound like I am complaining little one, but I am not. I know I will miss feeling you inside of me when you transition to an outside baby but it is SO DAMN WEIRD. You are for sure my little wiggle worm. Binx is not impressed as he is the original baby, or OB (kinda like OG):

You now weigh about 2.5 pounds and are 15.75 inches long! AND guess what? We made it to the third trimester OFFICIALLY. The final countdown has begun (cue the music). You continue to put on fat, make red blood cells, and your eyesight may be good enough to detect light filtering through the womb. I don't really run around with my belly out so much, so I am not sure if you have witnessed this yet. I thought about this fact last night though, and decided it was time to start doing bare-belly shots for that added shocking effect. Look! No stretch marks so far:

Do you like my hot pj shorts baby? Well get used to them, because in 12 weeks you will be seeing a lot more of them!

It just keeps happening.

27w 5d

I'd like to think that I'm not bad to look at, or so I've been told. I'm not one to fish for compliments by going around complaining that "I feeeel soooo ugly and faaaat!!!" pregnant or not. I am also not one to stand in front of a mirror for hours on end brushing my hair Marsha Brady-style and fish for compliments by saying, "My hair is pretty, don't you think my hair is pretty?". Men (and some women) look at me. I know this. My mom, Paul, friends have pointed this out to me. I never really noticed before.

Now, I DO notice. I notice that they see my face, look down at the belly and immediately look away. It keeps happening everywhere I go. Just last week I went to Chipotle and it happened TWICE! The first time was as I was parking. Some younger boys saw me in my car (belly unseen of course) and started making googly eyes at me. Then as soon as I stepped out of the car, belly in full force, they looked away. Obviously scared of catching pregnancy by staring for too long. The same way a laser beam permanently damages you retinas. The same thing happened, this time by men in business suits inside the restaurant as I was waddling to order my food.

I'm thinking about carrying a brush in my purse so I can stand in front of these men brushing my hair and proclaiming, "My hair is pretty. Don't you think I'm pretty? Stop looking down. FOCUS! Eyes up here! Look how magnificent my new boobs are!"

Half Baked

27w 4d

What do you get when you cross a 7 month pregnant chick with sunshine, a nice breeze, and a book? Why yes, you would be correct. You would get a miserable, red, half baked 7 month pregnant chick that is THIS MUCH smarter because she was reading a book. Yes, it was hot yesterday, but there was this wonderful breeze and I thought that maybe, just maybe if I sat outside for an hour and read a book to relax, I might get a little color on me and all would be right in the world. So I gathered up my book, glass of water, spray bottle and even a fan and extension cord to keep me extra cool and headed outside. Of course I made frequent trips inside to the bathroom and checked on my skin progress each time deciding that I was doing just fine. I was only out there for an hour, which usually is a-ok with my skin during any other summer. Not this time, my friends.

I came inside, took a shower and even then commented to myself how that hour was perfect - not really that red at all. Well by the time I was finished getting dressed and headed off to Kohl's, I was bright red. Uh-oh. By the time I got home, I felt like my skin was burning through my clothes. Stupid stupid stupid. So now I have the world's most ridiculous sun burn - only the front half of my body and only the front of my legs, arms and chest since I had a cover-up dress on. My face isn't as red as the rest of my body and my neck is still stark white since I was looking down to read.

The best part about all of this is the week that I chose to burn. This afternoon we are meeting BL's pediatrician and I feel slightly compelled to explain that the current state of my skin is NO indication of the type of parent I will be. SEE?! I kept myself cool with a fan and spray bottle the entire time I was outside so I wouldn't get overheated! I sacrificed my skin!!! I was only out there for an HOUR! I forgot that I am pastier than usual! I also have the first of four prenatal massages Thursday that my wonderful husband bought for me. Hopefully by then the masseuse will be able to work without me whimpering the entire time.

Dear Baby - 27 Weeks

27w

Dear Baby,

I promised lots of posts today and damn it, I am going to deliver. What is there to say after yesterday? You are beautiful. Perfect even. We can safely say that you have your dad's nose and possibly his lips and contrary to what he thinks, I am over the moon. You continue to be a strong one, kicking me all the time and even throwing some threatening punches at the poor ultrasound tech that was disrupting your afternoon nap. You also get this from your dad, trust me. Ask me sometime about how far away from me he is forced to sleep for fear of him hitting me during a mid-sleep jolt. You are now weighing in at a hefty 2.3 pounds and measuring somewhere around 15 inches. 15 inches! Holy coil of trail bologna!

Since you got your dad's looks can you please get my temper? And personality? Oh and a love for some type of art would be wonderful as well. Thanks.

Alright, that's all for this week. Still counting 'em down, 13 weeks to go! That means 13 more weeks of having to pay extreme attention when I scoot my chair into the dining room table and desk.

Now Starring: Baby Luc!

27w

Towards the end, watch his eye!


Rubbing his eyes/face:


Heart beating as well as him sucking his thumb towards the end!

Mini Paul

27w

Last night got crazy. Don't be mad. There will be lots of pictures, video and words today! That is, unless I pass out since the air is broken in my office. SWEEEET!

First up, 3D images from yesterday. BL was all snug up against the placenta almost the entire time but we managed to get some good shots of his face, including his Luc nose, courtesy of Paul. He has wonderfully chubby cheeks and is a thumb-sucker!




And finally, showing us what he thinks about my jokes:




Stay tuned for more kiddies!

Glamour Shots

26w 6d



I made this one look like a painting- that I will hang above my mantle and stare at longingly while I enjoy a nice fire and some scotch.



Enjoys long walks on the beach. Also loves to talk to birds and take relaxing afternoon, evening, and morning naps.

Look for an evening post recapping our 3D/4D ultrasound!

What I have learned so far, Part II

26w 5d

More things that pregnancy has taught me so far:
-People give you diapers. ALL THE TIME. Really! I guess it is some pay-it-forward law that the American Pregnant Women Association of America voted on and passed. BL's closet is filling up with diapers. Pretty soon we will run out of toilet paper and I'll be all, "No, it's cool. Don't waste the gas in the car, we'll just wear some of the baby's diapers", and then I will reach down towards the ground and grab one. You know, since by Friday they will surely be starting to trickle into the living room.

-Your feet, they swell. Yep. Those bones and veins that you see when you look at them, gone. I like to think of my tootsies as resembling bloated, dead fish sometimes. Then I make fishy faces.
-Ever wanted to hear a labor story? No problem. Just get pregnant, because then EVERYONE will want to tell you theirs. Including the lady who was hired to school you on how to administer life-saving CPR on your infant. She will spend about 2 minutes covering that little bit about chest compressions and shit and then the other 58 minutes talking about how she handled the pain. Oh the painful pain.
-What about your lungs and rib cage? Have you ever felt what it is like to be kicked in your lungs and rib cage? From the inside? Ask me. I know.
-Taking a bath is hard. Like college calculus-hard. Our bath tub is really deep and I basically have to get on all fours to ease myself into and out of the tub. But the time I spend in there? Pure bliss.
-You fart involuntarily. I used to pride myself on being able to keep up with the guys when it came to farting. I could rip them just as loud, with a little effort of course. But now? Now I just have to walk around - you know, around the OFFICE where other people are trying to do work. Then I have the daunting task of pretending to make fart noises with my mouth. I think it is time to just own up.

*Edit - I love free diapers, I really do. I was not complaining. I also love cakes. And sweaters.

Nervously fumbles with keyboard...

26w 4d

Hehe, um hi. So last week I was reading this article on Lil Sugar and I must say that it made my stomach hurt. No, that's not even the right way to put that. It literally made me feel uneasy, embarrassed, furious and insanely sad. The article was a bit vague on what the woman actually said to her mother in law after the fact, but I can tell you that I would have reacted a bit differently.

Screaming comes to mind. And a lifetime of possibly not speaking to, or at least avoiding my mother-in-law. I am all for breastfeeding, we have already covered this. What I will not stand for is someone else shoving their boob in my son's face and trying to feed him without asking. That last bit is funny to me since even if someone asked I would probably be immediately offended.

"Can you WHAT?! Go fly a kite!"

You see, I didn't even know that Cross Nursing existed until I read that article. So, in true Tiff form, I did some research. I get the whole thing about a mother not being able to breastfeed due to complications, medical reasons, etc. but it still gives me the heeby-jeebys. Apparently this is a common practice in some places, but I just can't stomach it. There are plenty of diseases that can be transmitted through breast milk including HIV. I guess this is my major problem with it - since I no way consider breastfeeding perverted, sexual, etc, which lets face it, is the problem that MANY people in this world have with it whether they realize it or not. That is a whole 'nother post, whole 'nother day!

So the explanation of my feelings towards cross-feeding would have to be, my kid, my decision. This could also be classified as "Your ass better ask me before you pull something like that with my child". Also included would have to be "is it healthy?". In my mind, no it is not. You would need several in-depth medical checks to feed my child - including some not-so-fun probing. GAH I'm kidding. Okay, not really.