Sunday, May 31, 2009

Babies and Cats

The similarities between cats and babies are astounding. Especially my cat and my baby. Since Mason has begun exploring our house, he has discovered the door stoppers. He loves to play with them and I have to endure constant BIOOONNGGGGG-ing until he moves on to his next victim. Binx used to love to paw at the door stoppers while we were in the bathroom. Sort of his little way of telling us that he really wanted in so he could get some pets while we were taking a dump. Another thing? They both love to sleep. LOVE IT (most of the time). Binx of course sleeps and cannot be disturbed (only for pets). Mason has a strict napping schedule that he has made for himself and if it is not followed, things like this happen:

Then there is the shower. No one can resist some fresh shower water, right? Binx loves to drink the leftover sudsy, surely mold-infested shower water laying on the shower floor. Mason of course spends my entire shower banging on the door with his chubby little hands waiting for the moment when I step out so he can crawl in.

They are both definitely my babies, and while one is probably neglected (I'll let you figure that one out) I love them both equally, but yet not, for different reasons? Yes, something like that. They fill my days with just the right amount of comic relief.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The zoo of laziness.

In weight-loss news, wellll there really isn't any. Memorial Day weekend sure didn't help and I have learned that I have no self control when it comes to pizza or ice cream EEK. I have been making progress in the running department, so that's encouraging. Last week I ran 8 miles total and this week I am going for at least 12. Moving on...

My sister-in-law and I went to the zoo last week and discovered that animals are LAZY. For reals.

Lazy kangaroos

Lazy gorilla

Big lazy cats

Mason really enjoys the zoo because he really enjoys animals of all kinds. Even the lazy kind. I guess he is used to that with Mr. Binx. I mean seriously, get up and DO SOMETHING. You have the life. You don't have to hunt, you get to play all day and you can pick if you want to be outside or inside. What is the effing problem?

There you go. Again, there really isn't that much SUPERDUPEREXCITING things going on around here. Just a bunch of NO NO NO's and chasing and whatnot. Ever since Mason started crawling, I feel like time is speeding up and before I know it my blog is neglected. Poor blog.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Like, OMG you guys.

I went to pick up pizza dinner last night and when I returned Paul was all "Hurry! He is crawling, grab the video camera" and I was all, "YAY! Finally!". So, this crawling thing, totally cool for about 5 minutes until you realize:
1. You aren't prepared. You still haven't babyproofed enough. Knives are still laying on coffee tables, medieval guillotine replicas are still lining the walls, etc.
2. You're new favorite word and possibly your son's first word is NO NO NO NO NO.
3. You really need to vacuum.
4. Vacuuming takes twice the amount of time when you are dragging an almost-toddler that has a death-grip on the cord behind you.
5. You still haven't ordered the baby gates! SHIT!

Do not fret internet people, I did baby proof the outlets, which of course was the first thing he went for this morning:
Without further rambling, here it is, THE video that only took 5 tries to capture (I know he is not sterotypical crawling yet, but trust, he gets where he needs to go):

He Crawls from Tiffany Luc on Vimeo.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Oh, Hi.

I really don't have anything exciting to write about. I guess it's been a week, huh? Well, let's see...I am sure I can ramble on here for a little bit to keep you from your job, husband, wife or kids. Digging deep...

Operation skinny mom is going well I think. I am really proud of how I have been eating minus one night* and I discovered yesterday that I CAN RUN. I was always the girl who skipped gym class the day we had to run the mile and when I hopped on the treadmill at the gym I ran 3 miles without even thinking about it. So I decided that since I do better with long term goals, I should set some. First up: a 5K. I will be running a 5K for the local children's hospital on June 7th. After that, I plan to do a couple more 5K's, some 10Ks, a half-marathon and eventually a full marathon. My ultimate goal is to run the Cleveland marathon next year, but if I only do half, I would be happy with that as well. Think of me.

Mason was baptised this weekend. We are not religious people, but it was something that was important to family, and I am a people pleaser. It makes me feel good as well, but I would have been fine either way. It was fun, very relaxed and of course entertaining since he FLIPPED the F OUT towards the end. *Which is the night I ate pizza, pasta salad and ice cream cake. I cheated. Bite me.
You heard my mom, BITE HER, I do all the time with my 4 rat teeth.

We had a garage sale and wedding last weekend as well. Yes, I am certifiably CRAZY. I came out of everything on Sunday alive (sort of) with an extra $400 in my pocket, a hangover, bloated belly, child that will not go to hell as of yet, and mean farmers tan. Go ME!

I think that about sums it up. We are off to the zoo today because it is going to be gorgeous outside. Wish me luck.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

My lovely lady bumps.

Okay Internet people. Mason is closing in on 9 months in approximately 23 days, which if I am remembering correctly is the exact amount of time (give or take a month, give) that it took him to cook inside of me and completely ruin my body or so I thought. After my stomach was given it's new purpose as the PORTAL TO LIFE or SLAB OF MEAT I promptly told myself that I had exactly the same amount of time to get my fat ass back into my WEDDING SHAPE sohelpmejeebus. Weeeeeellllll so, like, that didn't happen? And I was all NO MORE GESTATIONAL KISSMYASS-ABEETUS let's get ice cream! and margaritas! and YEAH.

So here I am, 23 days shy of my deadline which I will never make now, (you will see why) and I have decided that if I just blog about getting my body back and broadcast it to you, oh internets, that you will hold me accountable and I will HAVE to do it.

I don't like relying on a scale to tell me how I am doing, but I will this time for milestone purposes. I usually just like to rely on how my clothes are fitting but how would I get that across to you? "Pants are slightly more loose than yesterday, but could just need a good washing..." SO I will rely on a scale.

Starting weight: 127 (the heaviest I have ever been without a child inside of me)
Wedding (goal) weight: 115
Now before you get all eye-rolly and crap here this: I am 5' 1.5" tall so 12 pounds is HUGE on my frame so suck it.
Current BMI: 23.6
Goal BMI: 21.4 and not having a muffin top. You heard me.

At my first OB appointment at 6 weeks pregnant I weighed in somewhere around 123 I believe which was also right after Christmas and ohmygodcookies. So I have always counted 123 as my "pre-pregnancy" weight so naturally when the scale said 127 I knew I was FAILING.

My next weigh-in will be at the half-way point so in 11 days, also known as May 23rd. Oh, and I totally know that I won't lose ALL 12 pounds in 23 days because BAD but I am hoping to be making progress and will cut myself a little slack on the 9 month thing. Let the games begin!

Monday, May 11, 2009

That day...that was yesterday.

My first official Mother's Day went a little something like this: breakfast in bed with my two favorite guys, a spa visit for a gift (squeeeeeeeeels), family visits, outlet shopping and lots of playing. Oh yeah and then there was this:

Oh Hallo duck family waddling through our dirty garage. I will admit that this may have been theee CUTEST thing I have ever seen (minus my son) and shall prove that I AM NOT DEAD INSIDE DENISE. I think baby ducks are cute even though they shatted all over my rug. Mason thought it was pretty funny and so did some of our neighbors.

Mother's Day also brought on more OHSHIT feelings now that Mason is so close to crawling that he can taste it. And pulling up And poop. Lots and lots of poop. I think we have changed at least 15 poopy diapers in the past two days. I swear if another tooth is upon us I may end up in the looney bin. Again. Unless it gets progressively easier? Please tell me it gets easier the more teeth he has.


Okay now that I have rambled about everything including poop, here is some lovely Mother's Day

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Officially in for it.

I woke up sometime this week and someone had stolen my baby and replaced him with a pre-toddler. How does this happen? Nobody told me this would happen. I thought babies stayed small and immobile! They are not like puppies and kittens, they do not make you fall in love with their cuteness and then grow up into lazy, stubborn dogs and cats that no longer need you so much and just simply give a little nod here and there and totally don't listen to you when you yell NO! NO! do not chew on my shoe! or NO! NO! don't you even think of going out on the deck, you will not be coming back in mister!! ::deeeeeeep breathhhhhhh:: RIGHT?

On the move. from Tiffany Luc on Vimeo.

He actually does stand all the way up, but knees were good enough for him this morning. Shit.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Dear Mason - 8 Months

8 Months

Dear Mason,

When your father and I agreed to an "adults weekend" with friends 2 hours away I probably silently jumped up and down and screeeeeched to myself. Holy sleeping in, no diaper changing, dangling earrings and high heels! Little did I know that when it came down to actually handing you off to my mother-in-law, I would be a mess inside. 5 months ago, I would have been more than happy to leave you for a night. It sounds horrible and a lot of you are probably shaking your heads, reaching for the red x in the corner of your screen because you can't believe what a HORRIBLE mother I am BUT it's the truth. I was going through a lot, WE were going through a lot as a family. It's amazing how quickly things change. I have always loved you but I wasn't always THAT mom, crying at the thought of leaving her baby for one day.

When we came home, you were still out with Goga and Papa, gallivanting around Home Depot, and I had a chance to vacuum, take a shower and try to fight my minor hangover a little. It was so quiet, toys were still scattered around the house and for a split second I got a glance of my former life. That life seems so far gone. I can't imagine life before you, I don't remember it. Then you came home. I couldn't wait to see your little smile, your THREE teeth. You instantly began pulling my hair, sticking your fingers in my mouth and up my nose, it's like we never missed a beat.

Your ornery side is beginning to show, I knew it would eventually. At one time, I was declaring that you would not crawl but you have really started to make leaps and bounds in that department. Just this morning, you actually crawled a little towards the remote - ignoring the hundreds of toys scattered around you. I am baffled at the thought of planning a first birthday for MY SON in a mere 4 months. I guess all it takes is a night away and a glimpse of a former life to remind you of how lucky you are - even while clumps of your hair are being ripped out.

Our relationship at this moment kind of reminds me of a Bjork song and video - as strange as that sounds.

Embedding was disabled for the Bjork Youtube vid, but here's the link if you care: