My lovely lady bumps.

Okay Internet people. Mason is closing in on 9 months in approximately 23 days, which if I am remembering correctly is the exact amount of time (give or take a month, give) that it took him to cook inside of me and completely ruin my body or so I thought. After my stomach was given it's new purpose as the PORTAL TO LIFE or SLAB OF MEAT I promptly told myself that I had exactly the same amount of time to get my fat ass back into my WEDDING SHAPE sohelpmejeebus. Weeeeeellllll so, like, that didn't happen? And I was all NO MORE GESTATIONAL KISSMYASS-ABEETUS let's get ice cream! and margaritas! and YEAH.

So here I am, 23 days shy of my deadline which I will never make now, (you will see why) and I have decided that if I just blog about getting my body back and broadcast it to you, oh internets, that you will hold me accountable and I will HAVE to do it.

I don't like relying on a scale to tell me how I am doing, but I will this time for milestone purposes. I usually just like to rely on how my clothes are fitting but how would I get that across to you? "Pants are slightly more loose than yesterday, but could just need a good washing..." SO I will rely on a scale.

Starting weight: 127 (the heaviest I have ever been without a child inside of me)
Wedding (goal) weight: 115
Now before you get all eye-rolly and crap here this: I am 5' 1.5" tall so 12 pounds is HUGE on my frame so suck it.
Current BMI: 23.6
Goal BMI: 21.4 and not having a muffin top. You heard me.

At my first OB appointment at 6 weeks pregnant I weighed in somewhere around 123 I believe which was also right after Christmas and ohmygodcookies. So I have always counted 123 as my "pre-pregnancy" weight so naturally when the scale said 127 I knew I was FAILING.

My next weigh-in will be at the half-way point so in 11 days, also known as May 23rd. Oh, and I totally know that I won't lose ALL 12 pounds in 23 days because BAD but I am hoping to be making progress and will cut myself a little slack on the 9 month thing. Let the games begin!

Dear Mason - 2 Months

2 Months Old

Dear Mason,

Today, you turn 2 months old! You are such a big boy and you have changed so much this past month. You now smile at us and talk to us all the time, which is so refreshing after a month of you crying! We really started to figure you out this month and learned that pretty much the root of all of your problems was that you just weren't sleeping enough. Now that we have you on a good schedule and you are taking good naps throughout the day, everyone is happier and you sleep longer at night! SCORE!

One of your favorite things is the exercise gym that Aunt Chrissy let us borrow. You especially love the red bird and the lights and music. You also still love Jacques the Peacock and your new friend is the big Caterpillar that plays "If You're Happy and You Know It". You also think it is hilarious when mommy signs along. You also love your sound machine and the raindrop noise. You sleep so much better with that noise on! Bath time, or "tubby time" as we call it is definitely one of your happiest times. You love the warm water and kick your legs and coo like crazy. Recently, you discovered that there was a mirror on your left side and you love to stare at yourself. After tubby time is when you really get going. You talk non-stop while we give you a massage and dry you off. You absolutely love to be naked, but who doesn't?!

You drink 5 ounces of formula every 3-4 hours, play for a little while, then usually sleep for 1.5-2 hours. This is your little routine and it is wonderful! Bedtime for you is around 8pm and you eat one more time around 10:30pm before you sleep for usually 5-5.5 hours straight! Mommy and daddy love you for this!

Today you went for your 2 month well baby appointment, but it turns out you weren't so well. This morning you woke up with a nasty cough and stuffy nose. It is so hard to hear you cough and struggle. Luckily, we had the doctor's appointment and she was able to check you out. Your temperature was 99.9 rectally, which is good. There really isn't much we can do for you except run the humidifier and elevate your mattress to help with your congestion. We went ahead with two of your shots and you only cried for a minute. The doctor also wanted to see how well you hold your head up when on your stomach and you rolled over onto your back for her! You are so strong! You weighed 11 pounds, 15 ounces (50%) and measured 22.25 (25%) inches long.

We love you so much and enjoy watching you change and grow every day. You make us laugh so hard with your gas expulsion and the fact that you now know what your bottle is and will stare longingly at it when we burp you. I think you are getting a little too smart for us. Soon you will be balancing the checkbook and doing our taxes.

Here's to another wonderful month big man!

A Word from our Sponsor

I have been meaning to write this entry for a couple weeks now, but of course time slipped away from me. I never felt "right" after Mason was born. I have dealt with anxiety and depression before so I knew the drill, but this was a slow process. I attributed the first couple weeks of the crying and frustration to the baby blues. I even went as far as thinking that the one month mark was still baby blues. This was around the time that my sister-in-law gave me Brooke Shields' book Down Came the Rain. I read it during Mason's naps and cried. I could have wrote a lot of that book myself. I won't go too much into detail about what was going on in my head because it was scary. I would never hurt myself or Mason, but I did want to run away.

Things really came to a head during the fifth week of Mason's life. Paul was growing increasingly frustrated with me and my constant crying. I wasn't sleeping, Mason wasn't sleeping and I just plain wasn't enjoying myself. I knew my 6 week (which fell at the end of the 5th week) post-partum appointment was coming up and I was just trying to survive until then. I knew I needed help. As I said, I had dealt with this before and knew what was going on. I guess I just felt like I could handle it without medication this time. What I didn't take into consideration was that not only was I having to deal with my issues, but I also had to take care of a newborn and try to keep my marriage in tact as well. It just got too hard. I gave in.

I talked to my doctor and she didn't even hesitate to write me a prescription. I told her what I took in college and she gave me the same medication. I knew it would take effect immediately, but I can honestly say that at almost 2 weeks later, I am feeling so much better.

My friends and family obviously knew something was going on with me. I was told that I was not acting like myself and that made me sad. I am doing so much better now and actually starting to enjoy myself. Mason is really starting to interact with us and falling into a great pattern over the course of the day. I like to think it is because we are all so much happier.

I really thought it was important that I get this all out there because of my audience. Know that you are NOT crazy if you start feeling unlike yourself. Get help. Medication is not a bad thing, talking to someone is not a bad thing. You are only human and there is only so much you can handle. I can't remember who said this, or where I heard it, but it is SO TRUE:

Being a parent is the hardest job you will ever love.

Picture Update

I know I have been slacking lately, but "little" man is keeping us super busy! So here are some new photos to hold you over! Enjoy!

Church Halloween:

Playing:

Holy Growth Spurt

We are in the midst of Mason's 6 week growth spurt. I swear this little guy is going to eat us out of house and home! Just when we were stretching feedings to 4 or 5 hours, he decides he is now STARVING every 2-3 hours! He is also sleeping a lot which can be nice when all you feel like all you are doing is preparing bottles, feeding and changing him. Speaking of feeding, I am down to exclusively pumping so Mason can have 2 bottles of breast milk a day. The rest of the time he gets formula. My body pretty much decided this for me and abruptly stopped making large amounts of milk last weekend. I was getting ready to wean soon anyways, so it all worked out.

I will admit I am sad that I am no longer nursing him, but I think it definitely makes for a happier mom AND baby. He was getting really frustrated when he wasn't getting a full feeding from me and it is so sad to watch him go through that.

In other news, Mason now coos a little and is smiling lots in response to people. You have to work at it a little, but it happens! I love his little voice, it has a raspy sound to it - too cute. His next doctor appointment is a little over 2 weeks away and I am so anxious to see how much weight my little linebacker has packed on. I can't believe we are almost at 6 weeks! We really have the hang of things now, all we need is for him to start sleeping through the night and everything would be gravy! Wishful thinking!!

Are you confused? Let me help you.

Hi. This whole going 8 hours without eating starting at 5:30pm instead of, OH say 9:30pm thus giving mommy and daddy a full nights sleep, which equals SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT...it needs to stop. Or adjust itself. Any day now. KTHANKSBYE.

Splish Splash and Fun Feedings

Two Sundays ago, Mason was given his first bath. I was so excited when his umbilical stump fell off because I had been looking forward to giving the little guy a bath. Not because he was stinky or anything, it just seemed fun. HA! This was also the Sunday when we started noticing a little bit of diaper rash on him that would soon turn into FULL FLEDGED OUCHIE diaper rash, which is now looking tons better thanks to Aunt Chrissy's remedy.

At first, he seemed to like the bath and it's warm goodness on his little butt...

But that soon turned into "HOLY HELL the water is getting chilly and I am cold now get me out of here cruel vile people!"

Soon followed with "is it over? I am scared to look. Is the tubby gone?"

"Ahh yes. Warm towel. All done I presume. Now fetch me a boob."

So there you have it. He likes his baths at first, but as soon as the water temperature is not up to his highness' standards anymore, he screams bloody murder until we get him out. He really is such a good baby. He never cries just to cry. He only cries because one of the following things is wrong:

-dirty diaper
-hungry
-fighting sleep
-wants mommy/sick of daddy or wants daddy/sick of mommy
-gas bubble

He actually slept 3 hours in between feedings last night. Praise Jeebus. Hopefully this sticks at night. For the past almost 3 weeks, he had only been sleeping 2 hours from the start of one feeding to the start of the next. He was also doing marathon nursing sessions lasting sometimes 45 minutes. For example, he wakes up at 2am, I change him (5 mins), feed him (30-45 mins) and rock him back to sleep (10 mins), taking about an HOUR total putting us at 3am. We sleep until 4am (AN HOUR people) before he is up and hungry again. EEK.

He is finally cutting down the nursing to 15 minutes and passing out at the last burp. So the diaper change, nursing, burp and rocking to sleep has went down from one hour to about 20-30 minutes and then he doesn't eat again for another 2.5 hours. SO.MUCH.BETTER. I can only hope it gets shorter and shorter!

I don't think you're ready for this jelly.

Just a quick update - we had a nurse come visit from the local children's hospital (hey! it was free!) and she looked Mason over, weighed him, etc. He already weighs 7 pounds 15 ounces...and that was Friday! His next pediatrician appointment is on Tuesday, so I am sure he will be well over 8 pounds by then! He is just too cute and this IS getting a little easier. This breastfeeding stuff is the most difficult I think. More on that later.

I anticipate my next post to be about Mason's first bath, which was a week ago, including pictures. He actually likes his baths because he is dealing with a bit of a diaper rash. Poor guy. That's what happens when you continually poop all.day.long! Dude farts LOUD. Mom and dad are proud. There is no guess work in when he needs a diaper change.

I will be back soon with pictures and the first bath, breastfeeding stories, and my must-haves. Stay tuned and thanks for hanging in there with me!

Edit: And just because I am REALLY proud of this...I am already back down to the weight I was at my first OB appointment (which was at 6w pregnant)! Only 10 pounds to go until I am back to my goal!

Why Hello There!

Just got a chance to read everything and I must say that Colleen did a magnificent job, didn't she? Round of applause please! I will be sitting down to write my very long, very eventful birth story and share more pictures soon, but for now we are home and settling in. Mason is doing great and my nipples aren't, but what are you going to to do? The kid's a breast man. Thank you all for you thoughts and prayers and alllll of the comments! I loved reading them!

A HUGE thanks to Colleen, you will never know how much I appreciate this. Stay tuned internets, it is all just beginning!! Love you all!