Things really came to a head during the fifth week of Mason's life. Paul was growing increasingly frustrated with me and my constant crying. I wasn't sleeping, Mason wasn't sleeping and I just plain wasn't enjoying myself. I knew my 6 week (which fell at the end of the 5th week) post-partum appointment was coming up and I was just trying to survive until then. I knew I needed help. As I said, I had dealt with this before and knew what was going on. I guess I just felt like I could handle it without medication this time. What I didn't take into consideration was that not only was I having to deal with my issues, but I also had to take care of a newborn and try to keep my marriage in tact as well. It just got too hard. I gave in.
I talked to my doctor and she didn't even hesitate to write me a prescription. I told her what I took in college and she gave me the same medication. I knew it would take effect immediately, but I can honestly say that at almost 2 weeks later, I am feeling so much better.
My friends and family obviously knew something was going on with me. I was told that I was not acting like myself and that made me sad. I am doing so much better now and actually starting to enjoy myself. Mason is really starting to interact with us and falling into a great pattern over the course of the day. I like to think it is because we are all so much happier.
I really thought it was important that I get this all out there because of my audience. Know that you are NOT crazy if you start feeling unlike yourself. Get help. Medication is not a bad thing, talking to someone is not a bad thing. You are only human and there is only so much you can handle. I can't remember who said this, or where I heard it, but it is SO TRUE:
Being a parent is the hardest job you will ever love.